Wednesday, May 12, 2010

A new season?

So, Mother's Day went pretty well this year. My hubby and the kids did well pampering me with meals and gifts. The biggest part was that I didn't cry at church!!! Simone loves to make me cards and can't wait to give her gift so I got it the day before :)

Alex has been doing much better at school lately and seems to be less antsy. I am so grateful for his teacher taking the time to work through hard times and communicate with me about what is going on. I also can't say enough about his teacher from last year...Mrs. Walker....she took my SOS call and went to work. She's been keeping Alex after school occasionally to work with him on his reading and one day when I was just stressed out (and he was too) she kept him for 3 hours - WOW!

Mom is still trying to decide what to do with her life. I feel as though I am verging on a new season of my life where I should do something for me. I thought that something could be a part-time job but maybe it is a full-time job. I've put my name in on a few things and am hoping that the right thing happens. We shall see. I have had many people tell me that they see me everywhere in the community, which makes me happy. I've enjoyed getting to know Tipp and in only 18 months feel like we have made it our home.

As I write this I hear Alex singing all the songs from the Kidsbob 17 album....he is talented! Must get that from his father (well maybe the voice but his moves are mine!)!!

Saturday, May 8, 2010

Mother's Day is another Mother's Day. This day over the past few years has been difficult for me. Usually go to church and hear this message about being mothers, etc. and cry. I cry because I feel like my mothering is challenged more than other mothers. I feel like I don't do a good job with the mothering (see last post). I cry because I feel like the support from the mothers in my life hasn't been there for me while I am being challenged. I feel bad that I want time to myself often on Mother's Day and my wonderful husband has given me that a few times (taken the kids away so I have some quite time). Why would I want to not be a mother on Mother's Day...??? Yet, I saw a mom post on Facebook that she wanted a house where the kids didn't argue so taking them away would be the answer...maybe I'm not the only mother who wishes for that on Mother's Day.

This mothering thing, specifically the mothering of Alex has taken a lot out of me and required a lot of me specifically the last 7 years. Sometimes I am just so tired/worn down. I even feel like screaming "Is it my turn yet? When do I get to do something for me???" I also wish for more than one Mother's Day and yet, wondering if mothering every day is just that...Mother's Day.